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6 Ways to Kindly Support Others on Their Wellness Journey

Posted by Matt Welsh

· June 18, 2019

It’s always nice to see someone make a positive change in their life with the goal of bettering themselves. If they’ve taken a step in the right direction, you probably want to show them your love and support in order to encourage them to continue bettering themselves.

How do you support someone in a way that will help them overcome their difficulties and show progress without interfering too much? A bit of empathy and cleverness would go a long way. Here are some ways you can be kind and supportive to your close ones when they decide to make big changes.

1. Give them a gift

The art of gift giving is an often-underestimated part of friendship. When you know someone well enough to give them a wonderful gift that they will cherish and adore, then you can truly say that you’re close to them. Knowing what kind of gift to get is just another part of knowing the person.

If you’re particularly close to someone that enjoys fitness and bettering themselves in a physical way, what better gift to give them than a free fitness class? Clubs and training centres that organize fitness classes often give out coupons to get people to try the class out. You might run into one during a sponsored event, or you could ask around the centre itself to find out how to get one. It’s a way to motivate someone to attend the class without outright paying for the opportunity.

What if they aren’t looking to lose weight or gain muscles? If their idea of fitness includes relaxation or a calming atmosphere, Yoga would be a great alternative. While they’re also visiting a Yoga class, why not join them and make it a social activity for both of you? It could be an interesting bonding experience to find yourselves in a quiet Yoga class and relax while doing the various exercises. Hardly anyone would object to at least trying Yoga, considering how popular it has become in the past couple of years. You can rest easy knowing that they’ll love the suggestion.

2. Partake in healthy things around them

Everyone likes to enjoy a snack or two while they binge-watch movies or TV shows. You probably wouldn’t say no to a candy bar after a good work out, right? However, if some of your close ones have decided to make some drastic changes to their diet, you might want to keep up appearances in front of them. That isn’t to say that you should fake your enthusiasm or distaste for certain types of food, but rather you should be understanding of their current situation and support them by showing solidarity.

If you decide to have coffee together, you might want to consider healthier snacks for the occasion. If you normally bring out a bag of chips or salted peanuts, reconsider and switch them out with something that they might like. For someone on a diet, well-seasoned celery sticks are considered a saving grace as a quick snack. They have no calories whatsoever and they’re crunchy enough to qualify for a comfortable snack. On the other hand, you could always go the more dedicated route and make a specific kind of salad that might appeal to both of you. There’s no reason to overdo it since it’s your coffee date as well.

If you decide to bring a little something to the office, take care in noticing those who might not be able to eat the food that you brought. For example, if you brought doughnuts and one person is a diabetic, there’s no reason you can’t specify to the baker that one should be sugar-free. It’s a small gesture that goes a really long way in people’s minds.

3. Explore the great outdoors

Going outside is a wholesome activity no matter how you look at it. It’s not called “nature’s gym” for no reason. Exploring the outdoors can be a wonderful bonding experience that can bring two or more people together like nothing else. If you like hiking, mountaineering, or even biking, you can be sure that your friend or friends would love to go on a trip along with you.

Being cooped up in a stuffy gym isn’t something that everyone is content with. Seeing the same exact environment every time you work out can get tiresome and boring. Sight isn’t the only sense that suffers there, either. The music that plays is often comically generic, and only includes dance or pop hits, which don’t really appeal to everyone. Let’s not forget about the smell of sweat in an enclosed space and how it can affect your perception of the workout space. Partaking in some physical activities in the outdoors is the preferable option for many of these reasons.

What you choose to do is up to you. Consult your friends and figure out what everyone’s favourite option is. Consider the fact that having a run or riding a bike means that you have limitless options. There’s no shortage of nature to make use of for outdoor activities. And it’s not exactly an environment that you can get bored of since there’s always a trail that you haven’t tried out.

Natural environments also give you the opportunity to soak up the fresh air and warm sun. It’s an additional layer of healthy living that will motivate your friend and yourself to keep on fighting for wellness and health goals.

4. Root for them

Motivation is the biggest part of bettering yourself. Wanting to do things is great, but actually having the strength to get up and improve your current state is what really counts. Getting the drive to achieve things isn’t easy, and it depends on a multitude of factors.

A big part of motivation itself is how our environment treats us and our attempts to reach our goals. If you encounter indifference and boredom from your close ones whenever you talk about your hopes and dreams, it can affect you and your motivation significantly.

Try to be a shining beacon of hope and positive energy around your close ones whenever they decide to make big changes in their life. If the changes are positive, you could become a huge influence on how they view themselves and the decision they’ve made. You would be surprised at how much a simple smile or word of support could do in a situation like this.

5. Join in on the fun

If someone close to you enjoys certain activities and hanging out with you, why not combine both of these things and go do them together? Almost any activity is more fun when you have someone to share in the enjoyment with. Better yet, if your close one is interested in something that betters their health, you could take the opportunity to keep them company. Your presence and support will only motivate them further towards their goals.

Offer to join them when they go out for a run or bike ride. These activities can be painfully boring when you do them alone and having someone to talk to and share breaks with would improve them immensely. The most important factor is to create a routine for the shared activity as this can make the whole idea seem like an exciting adventure.

Don’t force yourself to do things that you don’t enjoy for the sake of your friend, because it’s pretty much certain that they’ll notice. Stick to things that you know you won’t mind. If you like riding a bike with your friend and they invite you on a ride through the park, get your bicycle off of the bike stand and go take it for a spin. If both of you are enthusiastic about a hike or ride through nature, you can be sure that you’ll enjoy it even more as a tandem team.

6. Avoid unhealthy temptations

There’s nothing wrong with partaking in the occasional “unhealthy” habit. Everyone’s human, you don’t need to be a robot that only strives for perfection. However, you need to keep in mind that some of those around you might be struggling with giving up some of those unhealthy habits. It’s easy to fall back in when you are exposed to them often.

Obviously, nobody likes a killjoy. You shouldn’t refrain from anything and everything that is fun simply because someone might not want to partake in every part of the activity. Just be a bit mindful of their choices and don’t pressure them to join in if they don’t want to. Peer pressure is a huge factor in certain unhealthy vices such as smoking, drinking, and eating unhealthy food.

Conclusion

People need a bit of encouragement and support when they make big changes in their life. Drastic changes take their toll on our mental state and getting a small push from our close ones can really improve the whole experience. If you find the time and energy to be supportive of your friends, you can be sure that you’ll contribute a lot more to their success than you might expect.

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Categories : Guest Posts, New Media

The Importance of Surrender and Guidance in Recovery

Posted by Matt Welsh

· June 17, 2019

· No Comments

In order to enter recovery successfully and really live a sober life, you need to be ready for a few things. One is, you need to absolutely let go of any control of your life at the moment. It has likely been chaotic at least recently and if you could of fixed it yourself you would have. It’s time to let other people, ones who have your best interest in mind, and whatever forces are in the universe to guide you in life. We call this surrender in recovery and it is the most vital part of getting sober. At the same time, it is also the hardest thing to do when getting sober.

In active addiction we are so locked into what our mind tells us to do that we will do things we never imagined possible. The slow down spiral of addiction (or fast sometimes) makes us slaves to the minds and the mind is exactly where our disease of addiction lies. When we promise others and ourselves that we are going to stop, because its getting out of control, our mind is the voice that tells us its okay to get high just one more time and then stop tomorrow. If you have ever dealt with or are currently dealing with addiction you know exactlywhat I am talking about.

So how do we counteract our sick minds from dominating us? We remove it from the equation. The main reason I personally have been able to stay sober for a few years is because in the beginning, I completely stopped listening to my own ideas about everything. I had relapsed too many times on my own ideas and I was so sick and tired of thinking that I knew what to do and that I was right. I went to treatment, did exactly as I was told, met some great people in an alumni program that was there, and when I left treatment I kept listening to others who had been where I had been before. My first year sober was so incredible because I had given up my will and fully accepted guidance in my life. Any other time I tried myself was such a failure compared to that.

It is also important to find someone in recovery who simply has what you want. Usually we spot this not by words but by actions and how someone carries themselves. After we have surrendered completely, we put it into the hands of whatever is out there to show us someone to now be our teacher. I know, it sounded crazy to me too. To let something out there people were calling ‘god’ or a ‘higher power’, something that I couldn’t see, and to trust it to introduce me to someone who can help save my life. Like I said I was all out of options at that time though, I had nothing to lose, so I trusted whatever is out there will introduce me to someone I need to meet and that’s exactly what happened not more than a day later.

Moments like that are what hooks us into recovery. The hardest part is first putting in the necessary work to get us to that first ‘aha!’ moment. Many people never get to it, go back out to addiction and don’t survive. If you are reading this and are just entering recovery, I beg you, leave the thinking up to somebody else for the time being and see how it goes. Worst case it doesn’t work and you can go back to whatever lifestyle you want. My first year sober was the best year of my life, finally living an honest and meaningful life is the greatest feeling you will ever experience. The hard part is getting there, let someone get you there.

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Daniel W is a writer in recovery from New Jersey who likes to share his experience with others to show that absolutely anyone can get sober provided they are ready to take action

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Categories : Addiction, Guest Posts

5 TOP INSPIRATIONAL SPORTS MOVIES

Posted by Matt Welsh

· June 16, 2019

· No Comments

Author: Trevor Charles

A good sports movie offers much more than entertainment. It is often a statement of human triumph against insurmountable odds. When watching inspirational sports movies, we can’t help but identify with the underdogs, struggle with them, fight with them, and finally cheers when they triumph.

Days after watching an inspirational movie, we still find ourselves thinking of the courage and strength displayed, and the resolve of the human spirit to overcome adversity. A truly inspirational movie can challenge us to better ourselves and double our efforts in order to overcome the difficulties we encounter on our way. With that in mind, here is a list of the top 5 must-see inspirational sports movies:

1. The Blind Side – 2007

This true inspirational story introduces us to 17-year-old Michael Oher, a struggling student with nowhere to call home. Michael struggles with life, but he has one thing going for him. He is extremely tall and big bodied which gets him enrolled at Wingate Christian School, in the hope that he could get into athletics.

At the school, Michael is befriended by a student called SJ Tuohy. The Tuohy family invites him to their home where he spends a night and later Thanksgiving. Eventually, they take over his guardianship and hire a private tutor to help him bring up his bad grades. They encourage him to try for the football team. He performs exceptionally well and joins the University of Mississippi eventually being one of the top NCAAF betting picks, and subsequently drafted by the Baltimore Ravens in the NLF.

This heartwarming story transcends the explosive issue of race, where a black young man is taken in, loved and guided by a white family. It shows that everyone has potential and often times what we all need is someone to believe in us and give us a helping hand.

2. Karate Kid – 2010

This 2010 film is about hard work, honesty, fairness and courage, starring Jackie Chan and Jaden Smith. It is a remake inspired in the classic of 1984 and follows a similar storyline.

12-year-old Dre Parker and his mother move to Beijing, China, where it doesn’t take him long to encounter the local bully and karate student Cheng. During a game at the park, Dre starts a conversation with a beautiful violin player which angers Cheng so much that he beats Dre up.

One day Dre pours dirty water on Cheng and his friends, prompting them to chase him and beat him up mercilessly. He is saved by the maintenance man in his building, Mr Han, who is an accomplished martial artist. He starts teaching Dre Karate and other life lessons. Dre participates at a Karate competition following a dare and beats Cheng and his team at their violent and unfair game.

3. Invictus – 2009

Set in the other side of the world, this 2009 film stars Morgan Freeman as beloved South African President Nelson Mandela and Matt Damon as François Pienaar, a rugby icon in the country. It is four years after Mandela’s 27-year prison sentence, and South Africa is torn by racial hatred and divisions stemming from apartheid.

The president decides to try and heal the divisions with rugby, a predominantly white sport at the time. He approaches the coach as well as the rugby union, and they start preparing for the 1995 Rugby World Cup despite scepticism from many quarters.

The team begins to make friends with fans and gradually feelings thaw, and all South Africans black and white start supporting them. They accomplish the impossible by winning the rugby world cup beating giants such as Australia, France and New Zealand.

This emotional movie depicts the value of forgiveness even under difficult circumstances, teamwork and trust. It reminds us that if we forget the colour of our skin, we can achieve great things.

4. We are Marshall – 2006

This tear-jerking film reminds us that even in the most difficult circumstances if we unite and stay strong, we shall be able to rise again.

One evening as the Marshall University football team returns home from a game their plane crashes killing all 75 on board including the players, coach, staff and trainers. The university president is set on suspending the football team but is convinced not to do so. A new football team is formed, and a coach hired to train them. They overcome many odds to rise again and start playing other university teams.

Matthew McConaughey plays the leading role in the biopic, as the lead coach Jack Lengyel and Matthew Fox plays his assistant, William “Red” Dawson. A must watch!

5. Coach Carter – 2005

Nothing like a tough coach who is not afraid of controversy to instil discipline in a football team! When he starts coaching the Richmond High School team, Coach Carter finds that the players lack discipline, are rude and disrespectful. He gives them tough new rules to follow, including attending all their classes and also teaches them how to play a disciplined game.

When they don’t improve, he shuts down the gym until they can bring up their grades. This decision is so unpopular that he is asked to quit as coach. In the end, the players stand by him, and they bring their grades up and continue playing well.

This movie is especially important for parents, teachers and guardians. Sometimes ‘tough love’ is needed to show young people the way. This movie is about believing in your convictions even when others think you are wrong.

It is inspired on a real story, from coach Ken Carter, who is portrayed in this movie by Samuel L. Jackson. Channing Tatum and Rob Brown are also part of the cast.

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Categories : Movies

Tags : inspirational movie

Best Natural Remedies for Anxiety

Posted by Matt Welsh

· June 14, 2019

· 1 Comment

Over-thinking, palms sweaty, excruciating pains in the chest, thoughts racing 80mph, sleeping troubles, worry, and more. Have you experienced any of these in your life, in recent days or yesterday, or even now while reading this? The stress of it all can be never-ending!

It is inevitable. Everyone goes through this phase of anxiousness. Be it a deadline at work, over thinking about small matters, or feeling uneasy or reckoning about something bad would happen. As inconvenient as it is to deal with anxiety, uncontrolled anxiety could take a toll on people’s mental health. The ability to feel helpless is a part of the process while going through anxiety. It’s also a way your body notifies you when you are stressing out about a relevant or an irrelevant subject.

Moreover, half the population in the world is diagnosed with an anxiety disorder, and most often, it is women who are affected by mental illness. You don’t have to be diagnosed with an anxiety disorder just to experience how bad anxiety is. You can still face drastic symptoms of anxiety now and again.

To look on the bright side, anxiety can be dealt with no involvement of a therapist or medications to keep in check with the levels. But, all one has to do is follow healthy eating habits and to focus on your breathing to help relax your mind and body.

Here are some simple and proven natural remedies for anxiety to help you calm down.

Ease Anxiety out with CBD oil

If you are at your wits’ end because of anxiety and if no amount of talking to therapists or taking antidepressants is helping you, it is natural for you to feel like there’s no solution to your anxiety. But, have you ever come across a story or read online on how CBD oil has changed the lives of people going through anxiety? If you have, then it is time for you to explore this option, too.

CBD oil has been around for decades because of its therapeutic charm, and it can trust for calming down your anxiety, which is just one of the healing properties the oil possesses. Nuleaf Naturals is one of the popular brands which said to be best cbd oil for anxiety. By using the CO2 extraction technique, hemp is grown by Nuleaf Naturals at their licensed farms in the state of Colorado. Because of its rigorous methods of extracting pure hemp CBD oil, Nuleaf Naturals steal the spotlight for dealing with anxiety and they are easily accessible with a discounted price by using nuleaf naturals coupon.

Get your feet workin’ and heart pumpin’

A well-known proven fact that science can vouch for is exercise and is one of the best ways to relieve anxiety. Working out regularly reduces anxiety symptoms such as worrying too much, over-the-top nervousness, then people prone to being a couch potato. Anxiety or not, exercise still has many benefits for the mind and body.

Cardiovascular workouts such as running, walking, jogging, aerobics, swimming, and cycling act as a mood booster.

Breathe In and Breathe Out

When hyperventilating becomes a norm while anxiety kicks in, deep breathing is the only fastest remedy that would come to the rescue. Deep breathing triggers the parasympathetic nervous system that helps your situation by counterbalancing stress and anxiety and calming the fight-or-flight response.

The next time you face with anxiety, take a deep breath-inhale through your nose for 4 seconds, hold it for about 7 seconds, and exhale through your mouth for a count of 8 seconds. Repeat it either for five to six times or as needed.

Embrace the warmth

Have you ever hugged or cuddled before? Taken a hot water bath? Took a dip at the beach? Know the feelings of warmth that exudes in all these? How relaxing and comforting was that?

Warm sensations help your body to release a neurotransmitter called serotonin that helps in controlling the mood. So, the next time when you are feeling anxious or stressed out, go take a long warm shower, bathe in a sauna, Jacuzzi, or a hot tub to unwind and relax.

Pamper yourself with a massage

Mellow it down with a nice rub-down from a professional or give one yourself spending no fortune every week. It is a universal fact that massage helps in ailing muscle tension, which leads to anxiety. Pick up a tennis ball and have it with you either at your work desk or at home. The moment you feel stressed, let the ball out and roll it under your feet or across your shoulders.

While you continue doing this, you can stretch it out and do easy yoga poses, which acts as instant anxiety relief and you have time to clear your head to what’s causing your anxiety to spike up, so you can breathe it out and let it go.

Sip on chamomile tea

Getting those butterfly jitters in your belly? Sedate yourself with a cup of chamomile tea. Chamomile tea has the same contents as any antidepressants that a therapist would give. It contains ingredients like apigenin and flavonoid, which reacts the same in the brain while taking antidepressants like Xanax and Valium.

If chamomile tea isn’t your cup of tea, then drink up a cup of green tea, which produces the same effect as chamomile and helps you unwind for the moment.

Add eggs for breakfast

Break your fast after a good night’s sleep with eggs. And stay a mile away from sugar and refined carbs. Skip it completely. Switch to a good source of fat and proteins first thing in the morning. Why because foods can also be considered as remedy for anxiety.

When you consume sugar and refined carbs, it leads to hypoglycemia, which causes anxiety with symptoms like excessive sweating, racing heart, shaking, and irritation. And when you consume eggs, your blood levels are controlled by eliminating mood swings, because of rich protein and fat.

Snooze or lose

Insomnia is directly related to anxiety with higher levels. It is still a dilemma whether it is because of anxiety one can’t sleep at night or it is because one can’t sleep at night, you are prone to getting anxiety. Whatever the answer is, it is a vicious cycle no one needs to be a part of.

It is highly recommended that one must get 7 to 9 hours of sleep per night. If sleeping becomes an issue because of your active thoughts, relax before you snooze. There are many ways you can do that. You can meditate for 10-15 minutes before going to bed, or use guided meditation to sleep or sleep hypnosis you can find online. These work wonders when you have trouble sleeping.

It is possible that anxiety may seem like the end of the world. But, it doesn’t have to be. All you need to do is breathe in and breathe out and follow the article to unwind and relax.

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Categories : New Media

Tags : CBD, CBD oil

How Many Calories Should You Eat Per Day to Lose Weight

Posted by Matt Welsh

· June 11, 2019

· No Comments

Good question! Calories are the small units of energy that you consume and are arguably the most talked-about part of weight loss and healthy eating. In short, calories are the unit that measures the energy content of foods and beverages.

The Rule of Thumb:

Keep in mind that if you consume more calories than you use, as a result, you’ll obtain weight, if you consume fewer calories than you use, as a result, you’ll lose weight. And if these numbers are pretty much same, then you have an ideal weight. You have to consume fewer calories to get rid of excess flab.

No doubt, it is complicated if you don’t have an idea about your caloric counter. Well, give a read to this post to know how to figure out how many calories you have to need to consume to lose weight.

How to Figure Out Your Caloric Counter:

It is true that weight loss can be an intimidating challenge but it becomes easy when you start tracking your calorie needs. Calories also work as fuel energy that you going to use in your regular activities. Well, according to many experts you have to use a weight loss calculator to track your daily calorie needs, this weight calculator tells you about the actual calories demands you have to consume to accomplish weight objective. The legitimate source of calculator-online.net provided the simple and best gadget of weight loss planner to track your calorie counter.

What Are The Recommendations?

A normal woman should consume about 2000 calories a day to keep up, and 1500 calories to lose 1 pound of weight per week. Normal man needs 2500 calories to keep up, and 2,000 to reduce 1 pound of weight per week.

But this depends upon numerous factors. Included in these are height, age, current weight, activity levels, metabolic health and lots of others.

500 Calories a Day:

If you decided to lose a pound, then there is a need to burn an extra 3,500 calories. There you need a 500 calorie daily deficit to lose a pound within a week. So, for the ease of weight loss, you have to utilize a weight loss calculator to get rid of excess pounds.

Reaching Your Weight Goal:

The given ways might work for you in the objective of weight loss!

Consume 1,300 (100 extra) calories a day and add a walk in your daily routine – it is the best way to burn the extra 700 calories per week
Eat up 1400 (200 extra) calories every day. And you have to add HIIT exercise into a daily routine twice per week and 30 minute walks through the week since it will help you to burn off the Additional 1,400 calories per Week
Eat up 1500 (300 excess) calories. Now you must add 45 minutes of moderate to vigorous workout for your everyday schedule since it helps burn up the additional 2100 energy each week

So, utilize weight calculator to figure out your daily caloric counter and add exercise in your daily routine to get rid of extra pounds.

At The Beginning of Weight Loss Program:

Focus on your daily caloric counter with the ease of weight loss planner and adopt the following:

Set Practical Goals
Quick Rule of Thumb on Calories
Diet & Exercise
Do Exercise As a Fun
Beware of Sugar
Sleep Well
Don’t Skip Breakfast
Drink Plenty of Water

More About Calories:

Yes, your total calorie intake does matter for weight reduction, and there is no doubt that all calories are not created equal. The calories that you consume form nutritious food sources will help you to feel full longer, improve your well-being, and provide fuel for your daily activity.

So, What Are The Healthy Foods?

Many experts recommend that you’ll have to fill your plate with the following:

You have to consume a variety of colorful vegetables like leafy salad greens, bright peppers, crunchy carrots or radishes. Get flavors that you are more likely to eat
Consume lean meats like chicken and fish. There are only a few individuals who enjoy red meat in moderation.
You have to intake enough fiber through the sources of healthy whole grain sources like oatmeal, whole grain bread or crackers, whole rye, quinoa
It is most important to intake whole fruits rather than fruit juices or fruit flavored snacks
Consume small servings of nuts, seeds, and other sources of healthy fats to get rid of that excess flab
Water for thirst is best for weight reduction instead of sports drinks, sweetened tea, or sodas

Diet Chart:

Best Foods for Weight Loss:

Lean Meat
Fish
Dry Fruits and Nuts
Skimmed Milk
Fruits
Vegetables

Foods to Avoid for Weight Loss:

Frozen Foods
Sugary Drinks
White Bread
High-Calorie Drinks
Pasta
Sugar
Alcohol
Processed foods and drinks

Tips for Burning Energy & Losing Weight:

Follow these tips and lose weight more effectively:

There is no need to skip breakfast and consume protein & healthy fat breakfast to get rid of extra pounds
Eat regular meals “skip starving”
You ought to intake slow-burning calories and keep the focus on high-fiber carbohydrates and healthy fats
Exercise is imperatively important for weight reduction, add exercise on your daily schedule as it is the great approach that helps you to burn off extra calories
You ought to stay hydrated, drink enough amount of water as it is good for your overall health as well as for weight reduction”
Avoid alcohol, sodas, or sports drinks “as these are the rich sources of calories”
Eat up fiber “whole grain is the best source of fiber like whole wheat, whole oats/oatmeal, whole-grain corn, millet, buckwheat, brown rice, quinoa, sorghum ”
There is a need to get enough sleep
Avoid eating 2 hours before bed “you ought to consume your dinner maximum 3 hours before going to bed”

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Categories : Guest Posts

Chat with Susan Rudnick, author of Edna’s Gift: How My Broken Sister Taught Me to Be Whole

Posted by Matt Welsh

· June 10, 2019

· No Comments

The title of your book is Edna’s Gift. What is the nature of that gift?

Like no one else in my life, my sister Edna loved me unconditionally. I was her wonderful “sister Susie” no matter what. She gave me my earliest experience of what it means to be accepted the way I was, no matter what. And more than that, this was Edna’s way of being in the world with everyone including herself. As a child when she went to a recreational club for handicapped children, she chose one of the most severely challenged girls as her best friend. Fritzi could barely speak, and was wheelchair bound. But that didn’t matter to Edna. They sang show tunes, and played records and had a grand time! And while others judged her as “handicapped”, a word I learned at a very young age, she was okay with herself. Oh, she knew there were things she was unable to do, but these were merely facts, not attributes to be used to judge someone. She saw herself as “differently abled” about 60 years before the term was coined. I like to say she held me in wholeness. There is no greater gift!!!

Also the words broken and whole appear in your title. What is the importance of these words to you? How do they apply to your life? And what is the connection with a spiritual path?

“The wound is the place where the light enters you.” Rumi

The intention and driving force of my book is the exploration of brokenness and wholeness and how they are profoundly and inescapably related. It is a complex multi-layered subject.

On the most basic level if a chair leg breaks, we consider the chair to be broken and we either throw it away or fix it, and then it is whole again. But what happens when we apply this view to people who are challenged or different? Are they broken? Do they need to be fixed? Yes, we can put a cast on a broken leg. Yes, we can have speech therapy to correct a lisp. But our society then goes a step further and devalues and stigmatizes those who are different.

Growing up with an all-pervading experience of this, as Edna and I were so close, only a year apart, I was drawn to other ways of understanding, which led first to psychotherapy and then to other spiritual paths. So in Judaism, Moses smashes the first tablet with the ten commandments on it, when he comes down from the mount, and sees that people have been living in an unethical way. He receives a second one. And all through their wanderings in the desert, the Jewish people carry both the broken and the whole tablets. Brokenness is part of who we are. In the Buddhist perspective we are all intrinsically whole, lacking nothing. Our belief systems may keep us from this truth, but this is our true nature. Through a practice of moment-to moment-meditation we can access this experience of wholeness.

Ultimately, and paradoxically, it was Edna herself and her way of being that became my first model of understanding. And that brings me back to Rumi. Quoting from my book, on the deepest level we are “always broken, forever whole.” The two are inextricably interwoven.

What was difficult about growing up with your sister?

I grew up with a kind of survivor’s guilt. There were so many things I could do that she couldn’t. I had friends, she didn’t, I could ice skate, skip, jump rope and play the piano, all of which were beyond her reach. I felt so guilty that I could enjoy these things and she couldn’t. The result was that although I didn’t stop myself from participating, I often would suppress my excitement and joy, so as not to make her feel bad. (That she would feel bad was mostly in my head, not hers.) I wouldn’t talk much about my experiences or triumphs. But worse, over time I didn’t feel much about them.

As an adult I have learned to allow myself the full experience of life. But sometimes I still bend over backwards not to offend or have people feel badly, when I’ve accomplished or experienced something they haven’t. Publishing this book has been a wonderful journey towards experiencing the joy of actually finishing a monumental ten-year project! And this is even though some people close to me might have wished to do so, but as yet, have not.

Society often misunderstands, labels and undervalues people with disabilities, seeing only hindrances instead of a whole person. How did you and your family deal with this as your sister and you were growing up, and what were the lessons you learned from it?

As a family we judged people by whether they were kind to Edna or not. If they were kind we were grateful, and they could enter our gates. If not, we turned our backs. Looking back it was like we were a handicapped family. We were sailing on different kind of ship than the families around us. And certainly while I was growing up I internalized that label and felt inadequate. But later on I learned to feel compassion for anyone who walks through life loaded down with labels. My ability to feel empathic is in large part what has made me a good psychotherapist. In a way I have spent my life learning not to label people or myself, not to think in terms of hierarchy or comparison, not to see the world in a polarized, black and white, or have and have not way. There is so much scarring and suffering that happens from this way of thinking.

How has being Jewish, and first generation American been a part of your life?

On the one hand I had parents with thick accents, who didn’t understand some of American culture. And in addition to my sister, that was just another way that I felt different and marginalized. I just wanted to be American and do things like drink coke and get a permanent for my hair, things my parents disparaged. As a child one aspiration I had was to be a drum majorette, and I convinced my mother to let me have baton twirling lessons in addition to my piano and dance ones.

But on the other hand I was fiercely proud of my parents who had the wisdom to leave Germany in the early thirties, because they saw the writing on the wall. They had a long refugee journey, which ended in NYC, where I was born. I grew up with a strong Jewish consciousness and a pride in being part of a group of people who has survived for thousands of years, and in the process made so many contributions to the well being of humanity. While we didn’t belong to a synagogue when I was a child, as an adult I have been a member of two wonderful synagogue communities, where I have always felt welcome.

In your teen years, you discovered your own invisible disability. How did that affect your relationship with Edna?

Yes, just short of my 16^thbirthday, when I hadn’t yet menstruated, my mother took me to a gynecologist and I learned that I was born without a uterus, and would, in fact never menstruate, and of course not be able to have birth children. At first, I felt like I was now with Edna in the deficit pile. I was now damaged goods just like her. Later in life I found out this syndrome has name: MRKH, and there are other women like me. For an inexplicable reason the doctor never gave me the actual name, and I grew up feeling like a complete anomaly. But in fact, how lucky I was to have Edna. It was her way of being and love for me that became the core of my strength and ability to find my way to self -acceptance.

What is the meaning of the kaleidoscope metaphor that emerges in your book?

A kaleidoscope has a fixed number of colored stones that create a pattern. But if you turn it even the tiniest bit, the stones rearrange themselves into another pattern. This is a metaphor I use in various places to illustrate the possibility of seeing the same situation or issue from another perspective that actually changes your reality. For example, toward the end of her life, because of health reasons, Edna needed to leave the spiritual community where she had lived for almost forty years, and move to a nursing home. I was horrified. But after awhile it turned out that with the 24 hour 7 care she got, she actually could live more independently than she had in her previous life. She arranged her own activities, took cabs to the local town for its greenmarket and went to concerts by herself. The kaleidoscope turned and I saw it all another way.

When your sister died you say it was a transformative experience for you, and led you to write the memoir. Can you say more about this?

After Edna died I really missed her, and although I had always known she was important to me, I didn’t quite realize how significant she really was. Writing the book was my journey of finding out. As I wrote I kept discovering more about how she helped me, just by being who she was. Also, like many challenged people, her life and accomplishments are not as visible as those of so-called normal people. Even friends and colleagues of mine didn’t know much about her. I wanted to honor her and make her life and its impact on me palpable and visible.

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Categories : Books, Exclusive Interviews

5 Ways To Distinguish Toxic Relationships From Healthy Ones

Posted by Matt Welsh

· June 7, 2019

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You cannot concentrate on your work when you have family problems in your mind. Living in a toxic relationship not only makes you frustrated, but it can lead you to some serious problems in the future. Especially, when you love that person and experience extreme bitterness from her. Are you really having a toxic relationship with your loved one? Or is it just a misunderstanding? You need to go for marital counseling before leaving your relationship because a qualified can identify the problems that arise between you and your loved ones. But you should not tolerate any physically and mentally abuse because abusing the partner physically is a criminal and you should take sufficient legal steps against your partner in this regard.

What is a toxic relationship?

Toxic relationship is an unhealthy bonding and you can find several problems in a toxic relationship. Somehow, such relationships get started with a sweet note but end with a bitter experience. In the case of a toxic relationship, you can find some physical, sexual and emotional abuses such as lying, cheating, gaslighting, distrust and dislike. Misunderstandings can happen in a healthy relationship, but you can resolve such issues through discussion. But you cannot resolve all existing problems in a toxic relationship because your partner will become more rigid and argumentative, and he or she will be unable to tolerate you more. Even you can also avail online counselling for your toxic relationship and professional counsellors can help you to remove all misunderstandings from your existing relationship.

5 Ways To Distinguish Toxic Relationships From Healthy Ones

Emotional abuse: in a healthy relationship, you should support your partner and you should not tear down your loved one for every little thing. But in a toxic relationship, your partner always tries to put you down and give evidence that you are guilty. If you want to remove all harshness from your relationship, then you must talk with your partner without any fear or harassment. Emotional abuses can make your partner isolated. Lack of communication, humiliation, shaming, manipulation of words and jealousy are the main reasons fora toxic relationship. Emotional stress not only makes your relationship toxic, but your professional field also tends to get affected due to such emotional stress. In this case, you must avoid such emotional stress and leave your toxic relationship.
Physical abuse: both of you are a human being and you should feel the pain of your partner. In a healthy relationship, there is no room for physical and sexual abuses. You may hurt your partner to prove your statement during an argument, but this is not the way to treat a human being. Your partner may use some weapons to hit you, kick you or choke you, and he can try to control you by showing his power and strength. This is a dangerous sign of nothing but the toxic relationship and physical abuse is a final call for you to leave the relationship. In a healthy relationship, your partner will always support you and he or she will feel the pain that you have. Your partner would not hurt you physically and it can happen only if she or he has psychological problems.
Cheating your partner: cheating or lying in a relationship is very harmful and you cannot stay with a partner who constantly cheats you in a healthy relationship. You may think about your children and cannot leave out from your existing relationship. But mentally or physically cheating from your partner can make you lonely and isolated. In this regard, you need to talktoyour partner and try to resolve such matters. Apart from that, you can go for the proper counselling and your partner will confess his or her faults in front of a counsellor. Else, you can ask for a complete break your toxic relationship. Cheating in a healthy relationship can turn your dream into a scare, and you cannot tolerate such things from your partner.
Gaslighting: Gaslighting is a type of emotional abuse that can destroy your healthy relationship. Your partner will try to cover up his or her wrongdoings by raising some question, and your partner will always try to make you fool. For example, if your partner is caught by the illicit messages on her mobile phone that proved her extramarital affair, then she might accuse you as a paranoid person. She will repeat her same statements again and again whenever you raise the same issue. Lying and manipulation in a relationship can increase your mental stress, and you should find away to leave out of your toxic relationship. In the case of a healthy relationship, both partners are committed and they never lie or manipulate their loved one.
Dislike: sometimes after spending many years, partners might feel bored, and they can dislike or ignore each other. As results, they can use some abusing words and spread negativity in their home. But there are several reasons behind this problem and your partner might be frustrated with his or her stressful life. So you need to spend some time with your partner and try to understand his or her problems. Accusing or disliking is different from cheating, and you can easily remove such problems from your healthy relationship through proper counselling. At least you can plan a trip with your partner to resolve these problems. But if your partner has the negative feelings about you and constantly accuses you ofeverything, then you must know that it is the time to say the final goodbye.

If you are in a toxic relationship then you can talk to the counsellor and find out the reasons behind your toxic relationship. Isolation and loneliness are the main problems of a toxic relationship, and you can spend some time with your family and friends to overcome your mental stress. Your relationship started with a good note, but now you might feel isolated due to the negligence of your partner. You deserve to be happy and healthy, and you should get rid of your toxic relationship, especially if you cannot resolve the problems with the help of a professional counsellor.

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Categories : Guest Posts, Relationships

Cultivating Gratitude in Sobriety

Posted by Matt Welsh

· June 7, 2019

· No Comments

Living in a state of constant gratitude can have a profound impact on a person’s emotions, state of mind, and overall outlook on life. Gratitude is an emotion characterized by thankfulness and appreciation of what one has or what one has experienced. In order to feel grateful, a person must acknowledge the blessings that they have in life, which can be a beneficial aspect in pointing individuals in recovery in the right direction.

During times of turmoil and distress, it is easy to become consumed by the struggles you may face in sobriety. Between making amends for past mistakes, dealing with medical issues, facing the consequences of addiction, and possibly experiencing the loss of a loved one, it can be difficult to ruminate on the positive things in life. However, taking a moment during difficult times to identify your blessings and gratitude can help you endure any struggles you may face in sobriety.

The Importance of Gratitude

Maintaining a gracious heart and soul in sobriety is an extremely important aspect of recovery. First and foremost, gratitude helps remind oneself of the positive things in life rather than becoming enveloped in the negatives. When facing great tribulation, try focusing on the friends and family you have who are there to love and support you. Focus on the little things in life that make you happy, whether it be sports, art, nature, or something as simple as laughter. Maintaining gratitude can transform struggles and difficult things into opportunities for strength and growth.

Gratitude is a key to happiness. A person who focuses on the negatives, or the things they don’t have, is bound to live an unsatisfied, unfulfilled life. However, a person who is grateful will have a more positive outlook on life as a whole. Having a negative outlook on life can make you more susceptible to relapse and misery, however, being grateful can help you attain happiness and stay sober.

Fostering a Grateful Heart

Gratitude is more than just a feeling – it involves action. When you are sad, sitting in a dark room alone doesn’t change the way you feel. It only makes it worse. On the other hand, if you reach out to your support group, talk about your feelings, and cope with your emotions in healthy ways, you have taken action to change the way you feel. Gratitude works in the same way.

Keep a Gratitude Journal

There is a variety of ways you can foster a grateful heart in sobriety through your actions. One method is by keeping a gratitude journal. Try keeping a small journal by your bedside table. Each night before going to sleep, make a list of things you are grateful for. These can be small tidbits or grandiose gestures – there is no right or wrong way to make a gratitude list. The next morning when you wake up, begin your day on a positive note by reading over your gratitude list from the night before. This will help remind you of your blessings and start your day off with a positive mindset.

Give Thanks

Another effective way of demonstrating action behind gratitude is by giving thanks. When somebody does something nice for you, be sure to thank them and express how much that person means to you. Regardless of how small a gesture may seem, showing appreciation and giving thanks clearly demonstrates your gratitude towards even the smallest situations in life.

On the contrary, give thanks to troublesome situations as well. Situations are not always what they appear to be and you never know what benefits may come from a negative situation. If you are a spiritual person, remind yourself that God puts you in the exact place you need to be during each moment of every day. Give thanks for the experience you have encountered, and wait to see what you can learn from it.

Help Others

Helping others is not only the foundation stone of recovery, but it is also a way to show appreciation for the sober life you have been given. Think of when you first embarked on your journey of recovery. Remember all of the people that helped you, requiring nothing in return. Maybe a stranger sat and talked with you over a cup of coffee, or maybe somebody gave you advice on a situation you were experiencing. Showing gratitude for the people who have helped you can be done by passing these gestures along to the next sick and suffering alcoholic or addict. Whether helping others is done directly or indirectly, it is bound to promote a sense of self-worth and purpose. Helping others gives you an opportunity to find gratitude in your purpose and in the fact that you have something to give to others.

A Grateful Recovery

Living in a constant state of gratitude in sobriety can provide you with a path to happiness, help you avoid becoming enveloped in negative thinking, and help you maintain sobriety in the long term. Having and practicing gratitude will help you stay connected to your emotions, your support group, and your own personal recovery.

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Cassidy Webb is an avid writer who works with JourneyPure to spread awareness around the disease of addiction. Her passion in life is to help others by sharing her experience, strength, and hope.

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Categories : Addiction, Guest Posts

Q&A with Tarek Mounib, Producer of Free Trip To Egypt film

Posted by Matt Welsh

· June 6, 2019

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Interviewer: How and when did the idea for this film originally come to you?

Tarek: Well, the original idea came towards the end of 2016, where it seems like there was a lot of hate filled rhetoric and suspicion and fear and all these things that were really plaguing us at the end of that year. And just like everyone else, I was also affected by it and wondering constantly what could I do to make some sort of positive contribution. And then the idea just came to me when I was sitting on a tram in Zurich. The whole vision of approaching Americans and kindness and instead of fear and trying to create some sort of bridge. And yeah, the inspiration came at the end of 2016 and it stayed for a while. And then at the beginning of 2017 is when we really started, yeah, creating the project and moving forward.

Interviewer: I know you’re personally of Egyptian heritage, but were born and raised in Canada and have more recently lived in Switzerland. How much traveling had you personally done to this region? And what was your initial impression of it?

Tarek: Well, I have been traveling to Egypt since I was a baby. We would spend many, many summers there as children. My mother would take my sister and I and sometimes my father would come and would spend the entire summer school vacation over there. So Egypt is a second home for me. And I identify quite a bit with Egyptians and I identify quite a bit obviously, as as a Canadian. And growing up in Canada, I feel Canada is my home.

Tarek: And yeah, I think that’s part of what really drives me to do what I’m doing. It’s when I see the suspicion, whether it’s from Egyptians towards Americans or vice versa, it’s seeing two people who I consider family disagreeing and not understanding each other and not seeing the beauty of the other person. So something in me just wants to say, “Hey, wake up the these people are nice too. We’re all part of the same family.” And I think it’s easier for me to maybe see that because I’ve been fortunate enough to grow up in both societies. And now Europe as well.

Interviewer: What role does politics play in American’s understanding of Islam?

Tarek: Well, I think politics in general, there are politicians that want to serve. And I really believe that. I think there are really good politicians that I’ve seen. And of course, there are also politicians that want power and manipulation. So they’ll just use any narrative to get people to believe what they want. So I think Islam has been used as the new enemy and as a way to create fear. And this has really, I think, tinged a lot of people’s view and made them afraid of Muslims. And it’s not just one way, because in the Arab world you also see fear and manipulation being used as well. And then you see a lot of Egyptians being afraid of Americans. And I think the really important point of this film is it was never about just breaking down stereotypes that Americans had of Egyptians. It was just as much the reverse. And it was just as much about Egyptians seeing the Americans the way they were. So we were really trying simply to just bring people together and see what happens when people connect as humans.

Interviewer: Were you surprised at how difficult it was to find people to go on this journey? How many submissions did you ultimately receive?

Tarek: Well, when I first started the project, we put it on social media. We put a YouTube video and we offered people a free trip to Egypt and spread the idea as far and wide as we could. The reactions I got in the beginning were extremely surprising because it wasn’t just, no, I don’t want to go. It was like they were just angry at me. Do you think I’m crazy? Do you think I want to be taken hostage? I will never meet with those savages and a lot of hate, I was really surprised about that. And to the point where I thought, “Oh my God, where have we come? What world do we live in now that just simply a trip triggers such hostility?”

Tarek: And it was only until I actually traveled myself to the United States and met Americans that my faith in humanity and in Americans was renewed. Because it’s always a different story when you listen to the news or you hear people or interact with people’s Internet personalities, that’s a completely different world than when you actually face to face talk to people. And even if they have views that are different than yours, you can at least connect on a human level. So even then it was still difficult to get submissions. And what actually surprised me was that the reason was not fear of safety or things of that sort. The biggest fear was looking bad. They were worried that they would look bad on camera or we would portray them in a bad way. And that made a lot of people that wanted to come on the trip say no in the end.

Tarek: So in the end we did receive quite a few submissions, but a lot of the submissions were just people who have traveled the world already and just wanted a free trip to Egypt. And we were really looking for people who hadn’t had much traveling, were genuinely curious or concerned and were ready to do some exploration.

Interviewer: Was there a similar apprehension on the part of the Americans Egyptian counterparts?

Tarek: Well actually, the Egyptian counterparts, first of all, I don’t think it’s a parallel situation because we’re taking Americans out of their homes and bringing them to foreign country. While in Egypt, we were asking the hosts to welcome Americans and show them their homes. So it’s hard to compare. And to be honest, when we told Egyptians about the idea that Americans are coming over and would you be interested in showing them their homes? They loved the idea. I mean there was no shortage of hosts. People were really excited. Because I think it’s something nice to actually receive guests and show them what you’re all about and talk and so. So it’s a different experience and we had a lot of interest.

Interviewer: Do you know how many of the Americans are still in touch with their Egyptian counterparts? Other than Ellen, do you know if any of them have been back to Egypt or have plans to visit?

Tarek: Well, it’s actually really moving because I think all of them are in touch with their Egyptian counterparts and many of us are in touch with each other. The Americans were in touch with each other. Ellen had a Thanksgiving dinner the year after the film and she invited Katie, the woman from Arizona that came and me. And then I met them in California for Thanksgiving because it was at Ellen’s sister. So there’s this little mini community that formed and all of them, when I speak to them, I’m still in touch with all of them, just have such fond memories. And they all say, “Yes, I’m going to go back to Egypt one day.” Or, “I’m going to bring my Egyptian friends over, I really want to do that.” So it’s really amazing. And one sees that in the film. It’s just amazingly powerful how 10 days, it was only 10 days, could lead to such powerful, transformative friendships.

Interviewer: Was any follow-up done with the Egyptian participants to see what they took away from the experience?

Tarek: I went back to Egypt a few times and I did meet with the Egyptians. We never really did a debrief with the Egyptians, but of course we talk about it. And I think most of the Egyptians, they didn’t have a lot of exposure to Americans. So this is really eye opening for them as well. And all of them seemed very moved by the whole event and learning. And I mean, you even see it in the film, there was one scene where Asmaa, the Egyptian host, was telling Katie how much her mother loved her, loved Katie. And that she was the first American she meant. And now she really wants to meet other Americans and she wants to learn more. And I think that’s really happened not only to the hosts, but to their families, et cetera. So it was really nice to also see how the Egyptians were impacted by the Americans.

Interviewer: What would you say is the most important takeaway from the making of this film? Not just for the American and Egyptian participants, but for you personally?

Tarek: Well, for me personally, it really renewed this whole activity of going to the United States, facing people that I was actually afraid of and speaking to them on a human level and then meeting them and taking them to Egypt, et cetera. This whole process really released a lot of fear inside me. And made me, renewed my faith in humanity actually, and made me believe that it is possible for people with radically different views on politics and religion, which are the major things that cause a lot of war, to live in peace and not only live in peace, but actually connect in a very deep way. And we didn’t, I don’t, and we never even asked people if we changed their political beliefs because that wasn’t the point and that wasn’t relevant to us. But people with such radically different political beliefs and religious beliefs and culturally different and economic background and education completely different, when they connected at a human level, they were able to live and coexist in peace and didn’t have to change their political views to fit in with each other.

Tarek: So that was really inspiring for me. And the film also forced me and this whole journey to look at my own prejudices. And there were times where I was engaged in debates with some of the stronger Christians, asking them is not possible that that people with other views can go to heaven, et cetera. And it really bothered me that they held these views that I felt were really radical. Until I finally realized, you know what, if they’re not harming anybody, let them have their views. And who am I to try to convert them to my views? Right? So I finally released that and when I was able to release that, I was able to really see the beautiful people that they were. Right?

Tarek: Jason, for example, invites homeless people to his house. He prays for people on the street. He’s genuinely concerned about human beings and he’s very courageous in the way he approaches people. So, now Jason and I are our close friends and I can really just enjoy him without having to change him. So that was also a major takeaway for me.

Interviewer: Did you experience any synchronicity or serendipity when you created your film? If so, how?

Tarek: Well, I think this whole journey was synchronistic, blessed, whatever you wish to use. Because I could not have simply, I mean, I don’t, I could not have simply created this film and journey by myself. I was really lucky that it attracted very interesting people from the beginning on to help implement the film. Some really talented people came on board very quickly. Then events kind of flowed, finding the Americans. We randomly just approached Brian and I asked him if he wanted to come to Egypt after two minutes and he said yes. So there were many examples of things like that happening.

Tarek: And then of course then came many obstacles that we had to overcome. So I felt this project is much bigger than me and the project is more using me, that I belong to the project than that the project belongs to me.

Interviewer: Tell me more about the Pledge To Listen. What is it and what do you hope to achieve?

Tarek: Well, the Pledge To Listen was basically inspired by the film. I was saying before, one of my major takeaways, it renewed my belief and trust in my faith in humanity. And I think because so many diverse groups, diverse people could live together in harmony. And I felt, I really felt what was really the reason behind that. And I felt it was really just simple human listening, listening with the heart, connecting, feeling who we are as human beings. And then I was feeling, well, we’re going to, many people hopefully, are going to see this film and let’s all connect with this Pledge To Listen.

Tarek: So, let’s look at our own, each of us, which I did, right? I was saying that I was not listening and I was trying to force my views. And I felt when I let go of that and just simply listened to the different views in front of me, then I didn’t have this need to convince or to change the person. And I’m really hoping that people will simply join this concept. Because what I’ve also noticed is that I spoke to a lot of people across the United States from the left, from the right, Trump supporters, anti-Trump, Democrats, Republicans, religious, nonreligious, all that. And what everyone held in common was this basically, this view that we can no longer talk to each other. And everyone seemed fed up with this polarity. And I think, what we all are yearning for is the days where you could argue with your friend at the kitchen table about a deep political view and not just feel that you hate each other in the end.

Tarek: So the Pledge To Listen is about joining up all those people who just simply want to see more listening and kindness in the world and join all those people up that want to see that we can talk and listen to each other. And that we don’t have to change each other and we can come together regardless of all our beliefs. Right? So that’s what I’m hoping to do is create this network of people who are interested in that and then create more dialogue with each other.

Tarek: So what we’re doing on June 12th is we’re organizing what we’re calling the Pledge To Listen day of unity. So we’re partnering with more than 30 national organizations who want to see more listening and kindness in the world. And the idea is June 12th people watch the film and it triggers hopefully the desire to talk and connect. And then the partner organizations, whether it’s the Listen First Project or the National Conversation Project or or many other of these organizations, they will continue the conversation so we can, all of us together bring back the old days of being able to listen and be kind to each other.

Interviewer: What’s next for you? Any plans for a sequel or do you know what your next project will be?

Tarek: The short answer is no, I don’t know what’s coming next. I know what inspires me about this project is the mission of the project, of connecting at a human level, bringing more listening and kindness to the world, bringing more understanding, creating dialogue, bringing different groups together. This is what inspires me. So my next project will be along that lines. It’ll continue in that form. At the moment, I’m really focused on creating dialogue and listening through this film. So it’s going to occupy a lot of my time for the coming months and I expect the next project will just be an evolution of that.

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Categories : Exclusive Interviews, Movies

Tags : Free trip to egypt

Five Steps to Happy Money

Posted by Matt Welsh

· June 5, 2019

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By Ken Honda, Author of Happy Money: The Japanese Art of Making Peace with Your Money

Originally published on Psych Central

Here is a list of five steps you can take, starting today, that will get you into the flow of Happy Money:

Shift out of the scarcity mind-set.

Each person has the ability to choose what kind of money mind-set they want to live with. That is why the first step to Happy Money is to get yourself into an abundant mind-set. Until now we have been taught to believe that money is scarce and that we have to get it before someone else does. We have become a culture that is obsessed with money. We are so focused on the amount of money that we do or don’t have that it cuts off our potential for a great life.

Why? Because we automatically assume that we won’t be able to make a living if we take a risk and go for what we really want. The concept that there is not enough in the world makes us feel small and less generous. Don’t let your mind-set limit your life’s potential. If you have an abundant mind-set, you start seeing new possibilities, you become more creative, and you become more capable of responding to difficulties in life. You free yourself to create your own destiny.

Forgive and heal your money wounds.

We know that our attitudes about money are mostly inherited. And the people whom we inherited those ideas from also inherited theirs. But you won’t get to Happy Money if you let this become cause for resentment. The people who went before you were young, inexperienced, and prone to all sorts of mistakes. You know this because you have been there too. Imagine the situation that your parents were in. They acted out of fear because they didn’t know any other way. They did what they had to do. If you can sympathize with their situation and their humanity, you can begin to understand why they made the mistakes they did. Then you can forgive them, and when you do, your heart will feel lighter. You can break the cycle of Unhappy Money by forgiving others and, just as importantly, by forgiving yourself for the mistakes you’ve made.

You can set the tone for a new era of Happy Money when you forgive and begin the process of healing. When we make peace with the past, those wounds cease to be an obstacle to our present happiness, and money stops feeling like a mysterious, uncontrollable force. That is what gives us the freedom to find the Happy Money flow that works for us.

Discover your gifts and get into the flow of Happy Money.

Everyone is born with certain gifts. Some people find them when they are young; others may need time to search. Uncovering your talents, and finding what brings you joy, is one of the most important things in life. If you are no longer burdened by the past, you will be surprised at how quickly your talents will be revealed to you. When you take an inventory of your life, all the dots begin to connect. Getting into a state of flow will become second nature. Difficulty and struggles will transform into fun and adventure right before your eyes. When you start sharing your gifts with the world, you kick-start the flow of Happy Money. Knowing who you are and where you feel most alive is what creates the groundwork for trust, because you have nothing to hide from.

The more you develop your gifts and the more you share your gifts, the more Happy Money you will attract. People who are successful in all kinds of fields credit their success to a love for what they do.

Trust Life

Trust is a major part of a happy state of being. Once you can truly trust in yourself and in those around you, life gets so much easier. Those everyday anxieties about the future begin to fade away. When everyone is looking out for each other with hearts and minds of abundance, we all become free to share and receive all the great things that money can do. There is no fear of what might happen in the future, because we know that we can count on people, and they can count on us.

Trust and fear cannot coexist. It is one or the other. Trust makes us more active, creative, and free, whereas fear stifles our actions, counters our intentions, and creates resentment. When we trust, we are free from expectations. Risk no longer feels like risk. Almost all the things that we worried would turn out terribly actually turn out to be some of the most positive things in our lives. The “bad” things that have happened to us end up working in our favor.

We know that everything that happens, positive or negative, will end up working out to support our lives in its own unique way. This is what frees us from the paralyzing anxiety of judging things in our lives as “good” and “bad.” That is why trusting people are more passionate and successful.

When we trust, we are able to become our authentic selves.

Say arigato all the time.

A world of Happy Money looks like a world in which everyone is continually expressing a deep appreciation for the energy that flows through their lives. A willingness to give and receive, rather than keep a tight clutch on what we have, is what creates the conditions for Happy Money. The positive energy of gratitude works for us and invites more money into our lives.

There are two kinds of people: those who are outwardly appreciative and those who always find something to blame or complain about. Which do you think is a more magnetic personality?

People who appreciate life are more liked, more approachable, and more attractive. As a result, they invite all kinds of opportunities into their lives.

We know that there will be times when things don’t go exactly as we planned. But a heart that says arigato in the face of it all gives us an inner resolve that navigates us right through all kinds of rough waters.

So take every chance you get to show your gratitude. Show appreciation for yourself. If you live in the flow of gratitude, your life will be full of unexpected miracles. When we are in this kind of flow with our inner self, and with those around us, we live with Happy Money!

ABOUT THE AUTHOR:

Ken Honda is the author of Happy Money: The Japanese Art of Making Peace with Your Money. He is a bestselling author of self-development books in Japan, where he has sold more than seven million books since 2001. While his financial expertise comes from owning and managing several businesses, his writings bridge the topics of finance and self-help, focusing on creating and generating personal wealth and happiness through deeper self-honesty. He is the first person from Japan to be voted into the Transformational Leadership Council. Fluent in Japanese and English, he has lived in Boston and currently resides in Tokyo. For more information, please visit https://kenhonda.com

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Categories : Books, Guest Posts

Tags : Money